Introduction
Summary of the Book Sex and the Citadel by Shereen El Feki. Before moving forward, let’s take a quick look at the book. Picture a world hidden beneath layers of silence and half-truths, a place where open conversation about love, desire, and the human body remains uncommon. Yet, peel back the centuries, and you discover that long before modern rules took hold, the Muslim world once embraced a more honest view of sexuality. Great poets, curious scholars, and ordinary people discussed intimacy with fascination rather than shame. Today, times have changed, with colonial scars, social pressures, and moral anxieties reshaping attitudes. But hope persists in unexpected corners—through dedicated therapists, daring filmmakers, quiet activists, and the determined voices of individuals who refuse to remain silent. This book invites you to journey through hidden histories, challenging taboos and secret struggles, as it explores how meaningful transformations in sexual awareness could blossom once again.
Chapter 1: Unveiling the Layers of a Once Vibrant Sexual Culture Hidden Behind Centuries of Silence.
Imagine stepping into a distant world where perfumes drifted through lush courtyards, and discussions of pleasure were not merely whispered but openly celebrated among scholars, poets, and everyday people. Centuries ago, in various parts of the Muslim world, cities like Cairo, Damascus, and Baghdad thrived as centers of art, learning, and yes, sensual enjoyment. Sexuality was not shamefully tucked away; rather, it was woven into daily life with surprising openness. Men and women wrote poetry filled with vivid romantic imagery, and storytellers spun tales of longing, desire, and affection in vibrant marketplaces. These older Islamic societies embraced human passions as natural elements of life. Sexual desire was not considered a sinister threat, but rather one aspect of a balanced, meaningful existence. Far from being limited or taboo, the concept of pleasure aligned with spiritual, intellectual, and emotional growth.
In these times, people could find entire libraries dedicated to works discussing love, intimacy, and eroticism, all viewed through an Islamic lens that considered the human body and its desires to be gifts from the Creator. Renowned scholars openly explored themes of attraction, marriage, pleasure, and the art of lovemaking. These discussions were not hidden in dark corners, but rather found in respected texts and shared among both men and women eager to understand their bodies and emotions. There was, of course, respect for modesty and moral codes, but these did not smother curiosity. Instead, the understanding was that honest conversations could keep relationships strong, ensure mutual happiness, and maintain social harmony. Such liberal attitudes might seem astonishing to the modern observer who only sees today’s conservative façade.
Travelers from Europe and beyond, who visited these lands long ago, left behind memoirs describing not just the architectural beauty and intellectual marvels, but also the frankness with which love and sensuality were acknowledged. Foreign guests were often amazed to see lively entertainment that included music, dance, and sensual performances. They encountered pleasure districts where people sought affection, warmth, or simply escape from everyday struggles. Even homosexual relationships, which today are often harshly judged, were then more openly tolerated in some areas, seen as part of the spectrum of human desire. There existed no strict boundaries that marked certain forms of love as shameful; instead, multiple expressions of attraction coexisted, shaping a diverse tapestry of intimate life.
This era of relative openness and cultural maturity did not arrive without context. It blossomed in ages when Islamic civilizations were global leaders in medicine, philosophy, and literature. Sexual well-being was viewed as a branch of overall health and personal fulfillment. Many manuals and treatises carefully explained the importance of pleasure within marriage and the responsibilities of partners toward each other’s satisfaction. It was an understanding that a stable, thriving society depended in part on personal happiness and emotional security behind closed doors. Yet these golden centuries of sexual acceptance would not last. They were destined to face intense pressures and transformations once foreign powers began to challenge Muslim societies. Gradually, outside influences and internal anxieties would cloud the picture, paving the way for more constrained attitudes toward sexuality.
Chapter 2: How the Heavy Hand of Foreign Powers Shaped Stricter Morals and Restricted Desires.
The comfortable world of open attitudes toward sexuality began to shift dramatically with the arrival of colonial forces from Europe. As the influence of Western nations grew and their armies pressed into Islamic territories, Muslim leaders and intellectuals started reflecting on the humiliations inflicted upon them by foreign occupation. Losing battles to outsiders, seeing once-proud cities overshadowed by rival empires, and watching old traditions questioned by foreign judges created a deep feeling of inferiority. This feeling, which Egyptians called uqdit al-khawaga or the foreigner complex, spread like a silent worry. Many people believed that if their society had slipped behind in military and economic strength, perhaps their moral framework was to blame. In their minds, uncontrolled sexual freedom might have weakened their collective spirit.
This line of thinking encouraged a return to more rigid interpretations of religious law, especially as individuals searched for ways to restore their lost pride and greatness. Ideas that had once embraced the human body’s natural desires now faced a barrage of accusations. Certain thinkers and religious movements argued that a loosening of sexual rules, including tolerance for homosexuality and open expressions of sensuality, had distracted people from higher purposes. They believed it made them vulnerable to foreign invaders. To counteract this perceived corruption, stricter moral codes were proposed. These codes advocated modesty, purity, and the confinement of sexual activity strictly within traditional marriages. The aim was to strengthen the moral backbone of society and restore its standing on the global stage.
In Egypt, one of the most influential organizations that emerged during this pivotal period was the Muslim Brotherhood. Founded in the early 20th century, this group insisted that a return to what they considered the true essence of Islamic law would lead Muslims back to power and respect. They championed repressive controls on behavior, especially sexual conduct. Their vision gained momentum as more people came to believe that disciplined social practices would save them from further humiliation. Over time, these ideas took root. The balance shifted dramatically toward silence, shame, and fear surrounding the open exploration of sexuality. Reproductive health, gender dynamics, and the rights of individuals to explore their own desires would be reinterpreted under these new, more restrictive lenses.
By the mid-20th century, the once-flourishing sexual environment of many Muslim cultures had withered under colonial pressures and the internal backlash that followed. Intellectual debates on erotic poetry and the art of lovemaking were replaced by hushed conversations or forbidden topics. Homosexuality, once treated with a measure of tolerance, became a subject often mentioned only to condemn. Foreign occupation had ended in many places, but the scars remained. The foreigner complex lingered, as if countless minds were still entangled in the memory of defeat. As Islamic societies navigated the murky waters of post-colonial reconstruction, many people felt too uncertain, too insecure, to openly reclaim past freedoms. Instead, a heavier moral code settled in, leaving generations with stricter expectations and fewer avenues for open dialogue about intimacy.
Chapter 3: When Silence Surrounds Desire: Sexual Repression, Unfulfilled Marriages, and the Brave Voices Breaking Taboos.
Imagine growing up in an environment where parents, teachers, and elders rarely mention the word sex, and if they do, it is cloaked in warnings and silence. In many modern Muslim societies, open conversation about intimacy is often considered embarrassing or even sinful. Formal sex education is largely absent from schools, and it’s common for young people to enter adulthood knowing very little about their bodies and emotional needs. This silence has real consequences. Without guidance or trust in open communication, newlyweds struggle to understand each other’s desires, leading to frustration and dissatisfaction. Many couples drift into routines that neither party truly enjoys, all because they lack even the simplest vocabulary or confidence to discuss what they want or need.
Women often bear the heaviest burdens of this lack of knowledge and honesty. Research by Egyptian gynecologists and sex therapists has shown that a large percentage of married women experience dissatisfaction and even pain in their sexual lives. Some never learn the importance of their own pleasure. Others suffer silently when their husbands remain unaware of basic female anatomy or dismissive of their wives’ comfort and fulfillment. In a society that generally avoids talking about intimacy, women’s struggles remain hidden. It’s also important to note that abuse and non-consensual acts sometimes occur, and these issues rarely find the spotlight they deserve for serious reform. The silence, unfortunately, allows harmful patterns to continue unchallenged.
However, amidst this hush, some courageous voices are emerging to break down the thick walls of taboo. One notable example in Egypt is the work of Dr. Hiba Kotba, a sex therapist who once hosted a television show aimed at answering people’s most pressing, often unasked, questions about sex. Her approach, though still modest by Western standards, was groundbreaking for Muslim audiences who had never seen such open discussions before. She spoke about everything from wedding night jitters to the mysteries of anatomy and the importance of mutual pleasure. Her compassionate and respectful tone attracted viewers who were hungry for guidance that neither school nor family provided.
Though Kotba’s show and private counseling sessions represent only a small step, they highlight the beginning of a much-needed conversation. By putting real words to bodily functions and human emotions, by encouraging couples to share feelings, and by gently dismantling the shame associated with knowledge, these efforts can gradually improve marital satisfaction and emotional intimacy. It’s a reminder that change does not always happen through big, sweeping revolutions. Sometimes, it emerges from a caring individual willing to speak out and help others find their voice. The more people like Dr. Kotba appear, the more families might find the courage to teach their children that healthy sexuality can be understood, nurtured, and celebrated rather than feared and ignored.
Chapter 4: The High Stakes of Virginity and the Hidden World of Medical Fakery to Preserve Bridal Purity.
In some Muslim cultures, a bride’s entire worth on her wedding night can hinge on one small piece of tissue: the hymen. Families frequently expect a bride to be a virgin on her wedding day, believing that an unbroken hymen is proof of her purity and moral standing. This expectation creates enormous stress for young women. They grow up aware that any accident, even a simple sports injury or a nonsexual mishap, could rupture the delicate membrane and cast suspicion on their virtue. Many fear that if they fail this test, their worthiness as daughters, brides, or future mothers-in-law vanishes. The social pressure is so intense that regular, healthy interaction with their own bodies can become a source of anxiety.
Because of these harsh expectations, there’s an entire underground network dedicated to preserving or faking virginity. Doctors sometimes become reluctant accomplices, performing virginity tests or offering certificates that promise a girl’s honor is intact. In other cases, medical procedures are carried out to stitch or reconstruct the hymen so that, on the wedding night, it will bleed as expected. This charade places enormous financial and emotional burdens on families. While some operations might be relatively inexpensive, others can cost hundreds or thousands of pounds, effectively draining months of a family’s income. The anxiety surrounding such procedures and inspections reduces intimate moments to a performance rather than a shared expression of trust and love.
Ironically, many young couples who try to outsmart these strict rules and keep the hymen unbroken before marriage often engage in risky sexual activities that still involve partial penetration or unprotected contact. This can lead to the very accidents and ruptures they were trying to avoid in the first place. The fear of being discovered, judged, or even violently punished for failing this test is so strong that some young women hardly understand the natural changes their bodies undergo. Instead of celebrating the joys of growing into adulthood, they view their body as a ticking time bomb that must remain sealed off until a specific date.
Such intense scrutiny drains tenderness and sincerity from the wedding night. Instead of focusing on mutual love, new couples wrestle with scripted expectations: the bride must prove her purity, and the groom must confirm it. The broader community often expects visible evidence—such as a blood-stained sheet—that will circulate as proof of her virginity. The result is a twisted ritual more about public approval than private happiness. While some activists and medical professionals quietly challenge these practices, it will take time and patience to dismantle such deep-rooted traditions. As long as a woman’s worth is measured by a tiny membrane rather than her character, compassion, or intelligence, the struggle to free marriage from this oppressive requirement will continue.
Chapter 5: Old Glamour and Sensual Tales: How Early Egyptian Cinema Dared to Whisper About Desire.
Before the rise of stringent censorship in the late 20th and early 21st centuries, Egyptian cinema served as a window into changing sexual attitudes. In the 1960s and 1970s, Egyptian films were famously passionate, filled with songs, lively dances, and open hints of romance. Movies did not shy away from suggesting that people have appetites for passion, even if they rarely showed explicit scenes. This was a golden era for performers and storytellers. Beautiful actresses like Yousra starred in films with titles that left little to the imagination, and moviegoers flocked to theaters for a taste of glamour, intrigue, and faintly daring sensuality. In contrast to today’s restrictions, these films suggested that sexuality, while delicately handled, could be acknowledged and artistically explored.
During this period, filmmakers used the silver screen to reflect and challenge the social norms of their time. They showcased women making choices about marriage, love affairs, and their own physical desires. Men were also presented in more complex roles, sometimes struggling to fulfill their partners’ needs, sometimes drawn into extramarital flings. Even if the films did not depict explicit nudity or graphic acts, they often contained passionate embraces, longing gazes, and subtle symbolic gestures hinting at hidden yearnings. Audiences appreciated these clever cinematic codes that conveyed emotions without spelling them out directly. Instead of telling viewers what to think, the movies invited them to imagine what lay beneath the surface.
This era was not just about thrilling stories and charming actors. It was also a time of open debates about women’s rights, national identity, and modern values. Filmmakers experimented with plots that touched upon controversial topics like female desire, the strain of unsatisfying marriages, and the emotional toll of societal pressures. In doing so, they made room for conversations that might never have occurred in quiet family living rooms. By watching characters wrestle with love and lust on the big screen, people were gently encouraged to think about their own relationships. Cinema became a cultural mirror, showing audiences that sexual frustration and secret longing were not alien or abnormal—just part of being human.
Yet, even in these more adventurous times, directors had to remain cautious. Suggestive scenes needed to be balanced by moral lessons or proper endings that reaffirmed the accepted codes of decency. The censors, though less aggressive than today, still kept a watchful eye. Filmmakers learned to navigate a delicate dance, stretching boundaries just far enough to captivate viewers without sparking furious reactions from religious leaders, conservative communities, or government officials. The results were movies that shimmered with veiled passion—close enough to reality to be exciting, but subtle enough to slip under the radar of those who would clamp down on such expressions. In these decades, cinema proved that storytelling could serve as both entertainment and quiet rebellion, gently nudging the public toward broader horizons.
Chapter 6: Cracking Down on the Moving Image: Censorship’s Rise and the Slow Disappearance of Open Discussions in Film.
As time rolled on and more conservative powers gained influence in politics and society, movie screens gradually dimmed their glow of sexual openness. By the early 21st century, censorship boards in countries like Egypt applied stricter rules, forcing filmmakers to cut scenes, remove suggestive dialogue, and avoid anything that might hint at sexual liberation. Entire sequences vanished under the censor’s blade. A once lively cinematic tradition was forced into safe corners, and the characters on screen grew tame, avoiding any displays that could be considered too bold. Scenes that once featured subtle caresses now had to rely on distant looks. Beach embraces gave way to chaste conversations. Audiences saw fewer examples of women asserting their desires and men acknowledging their failures as lovers.
This new era is marked by movies like Ahasis, a film that tried to address the frustration of wives dissatisfied in their marriages. The original script featured intimate moments, honest portrayals of longing, and characters who dared to step outside the traditional bounds of marital duty. But by the time censors finished trimming the film, most of these scenes were gone. What remained was a faint hint of what could have been: a suggestion that these women might be unhappy, but hardly any direct glimpse into their personal struggles behind closed doors. Even so, the authorities labeled the movie adults-only, a sign that even its watered-down version was considered too sensitive for younger viewers.
As groups like the modern Muslim Brotherhood rose to prominence, they put forward notions like Clean Cinema, a movement designed to ensure that films did not stray from conservative moral codes. Under their watchful eyes, any suggestion that characters might mix faith and sexual desire was strictly forbidden. One screenplay, for instance, aimed to depict a woman running a secret prostitution ring while wearing a headscarf. This storyline triggered immediate backlash, resulting in the film’s cancellation before filming could finish. Through such actions, censors made it clear that connecting sexuality with religious symbols was the ultimate red line. The creative freedom that once allowed subtle discussions of human intimacy slipped further out of reach.
This wave of censorship is more than a matter of cutting steamy scenes. It represents the loss of an outlet that once encouraged people to acknowledge their private struggles in a public forum. Cinema, which had the power to spark debates and gradually shift perspectives, now operates under heavier shackles. Without open portrayals of intimacy, viewers lose a chance to feel less alone in their complex emotions. Filmmakers themselves become wary of exploring important topics, fearing punishment or public outrage. As the camera lens narrows its vision, society loses a mirror that once reflected not only its virtues but also its vulnerabilities. In this way, censorship curtails more than just provocative images—it also stifles honest conversations about life, love, and the human experience.
Chapter 7: The Mask of Legitimacy: Temporary Marriages, Economic Hardship, and the Dark Shadow of Modern Exploitation.
In an effort to navigate the strict moral codes around extramarital intimacy, some Muslim societies have revived or reinterpreted old practices known as temporary marriages. In theory, these arrangements once allowed couples to form a short-term union that was legitimate in religious terms. Historically, they might have served certain social needs, such as accommodating travelers or providing widows a socially acceptable means of financial and emotional support. But in modern Cairo, this practice has taken a disturbing turn. Temporary marriages have become a thin cover that enables wealthy men, often visiting from abroad, to pay for a week or two of sexual companionship without risking legal trouble or social condemnation. In reality, these transactions are closer to short-term prostitution than true marriages.
For desperate families struggling to survive on meager incomes, the lure of quick cash can be impossible to resist. Pimps and brokers operate in this murky underground, connecting vulnerable young women—sometimes still teenagers—to men willing to pay large sums for a brief marital holiday. Fathers, mothers, and grandparents, who cannot afford rent or regular meals, might see no other way out. They reason that by letting their daughter spend a few nights in luxury, their entire family can live more comfortably for months or even years to come. The young women involved find themselves cornered by economic forces and social expectations. Their forced smiles and silence hide deep sadness, fear, and shame.
One such victim might be a girl named Samia. She comes from a cramped home where multiple generations share limited resources. Life is a constant struggle. When a broker knocks on the door, offering a sum of money that dwarfs the family’s monthly income, her parents waver, then agree. Samia travels to Cairo and enters into a temporary marriage contract with a stranger. For a week, she is expected to fulfill his desires. When she returns home with the payment, her family breathes easier, at least for a while. But Samia carries the emotional scars of feeling used and discarded. She knows her husband had no intention of staying, loving, or respecting her.
This grim arrangement shows how the clash between strict sexual rules and severe poverty can produce cruel outcomes. Instead of helping couples navigate moral challenges, the system enables a form of exploitation that hides behind religious language. The men who pay enjoy their vacation from morality, while the women trapped in these contracts endure emotional pain, trauma, and a lifetime of regrets. Legal authorities often turn a blind eye to these arrangements, so long as they occur behind closed doors. As a result, the cycle continues. It’s a reminder that imposing rigid rules without addressing economic injustice can breed new forms of harm. Without broader reforms—both economic and cultural—temporary marriages remain a sad loophole that transforms human need into a cruel marketplace.
Chapter 8: Unspoken Truths: The Quiet Suffering of the LGBTQ+ Community in a World Without Words.
In a society that finds it challenging to talk openly about heterosexual intimacy, it’s even harder to discuss same-sex desire. In many Muslim cultures, words for gay, lesbian, or transgender are either absent or used mainly as insults. When language itself is limited, entire identities struggle to find expression. This absence of respectful vocabulary keeps LGBTQ+ individuals in the shadows, leaving them uncertain, isolated, and often afraid. It’s not that same-sex attraction never existed; it always has, woven quietly into the human tapestry. But in modern Muslim societies, it often must remain hidden, without the words to describe, the spaces to gather, or the legal recognition to protect.
Some people, like Hisham, navigate a double life. Married with children, he is expected to fulfill traditional family roles. Yet he experiences attraction to men and maintains secret relationships that bring him comfort and love. Hisham’s strategy is to compartmentalize his world. With his family, he plays the role of faithful husband and devoted father. Away from them, he might meet a man he truly desires. He must keep these two halves carefully separated, wary that discovery could cost him his marriage, reputation, or even personal safety. It’s a difficult balance that requires constant vigilance and deep emotional strain.
Others, like the artist Anwar, see advantages in a culture that prefers silence over confrontation. In Europe, where LGBTQ+ identities are openly discussed, Anwar feels boxed in by categories. There, he might be labeled a gay artist first, and everything else second. In contrast, when he’s in Egypt, he can simply be Anwar, the artist, without anyone openly examining his private life. The silence, while stifling in some respects, also grants him a kind of freedom. He is not forced into public debates about his identity because, ironically, the topic remains taboo. This complicated situation reveals that while silence and shame are harmful, open acknowledgment in a judgmental environment can also feel like a prison of definitions.
The LGBTQ+ community stands at a crossroads in these societies. Without acceptance, their lives are marked by fear, secrecy, and emotional conflict. Yet complete openness seems nearly impossible given the harsh social and legal punishments that could follow. What many activists and allies hope for is not the forced adoption of Western identity politics, but a space within their own culture’s traditions for understanding and compassion. Finding words that do not insult or degrade, allowing individuals to define themselves with dignity, and recognizing their struggles as part of the human condition—these are crucial steps. For now, LGBTQ+ Muslims often live in silent waiting, hoping that the day will come when speaking honestly about who they are does not lead to disaster.
Chapter 9: Toward Hope and Change: How External Support and Respectful Alliances Can Nurture Sexual Liberation.
After seeing so many barriers, one might wonder: can a sexual revolution bloom again in the Muslim world? Change rarely happens overnight, and it cannot be forced by outsiders. However, the West can play a supportive role by offering respectful alliances and careful assistance. Instead of imposing standards or demanding instant transformations, external partners can invest in local organizations that are already working hard for more open attitudes about sexuality, gender equality, and reproductive rights. These groups understand the cultural context and know where to push gently and where to pause. They have the trust of their communities and can guide discussions that outsiders could never spark without appearing controlling or patronizing.
Funding is one way to help. After political upheavals in places like Egypt, Western donors contributed millions to local charities and civil society organizations. This money can be directed toward educational programs that introduce basic sex education in a culturally sensitive manner. It can support counseling centers that treat victims of abuse and offer advice to couples struggling with intimacy. It can even back media projects that experiment with subtle storytelling, gently opening up conversations about desire, consent, and respect. By avoiding judgmental attitudes and accepting that progress might look different than it does in Europe or the United States, Western allies can foster an environment that nourishes fresh, locally guided initiatives.
One crucial lesson is that pushing for a strict secular approach or demanding that Muslim societies exactly copy Western models can backfire. This kind of pressure can alienate the very groups that need support. Historical examples show that Islamic traditions once harbored a healthy appreciation for sexuality, so rediscovering those roots does not require a complete break with religion. It means encouraging nuanced interpretations of faith that acknowledge human needs. Rather than cutting funds when religious parties gain influence, external partners should look more closely at how grassroots groups continue their work quietly, even under challenging regimes. Patience, cultural understanding, and long-term commitment are more helpful than quick fixes.
No society is monolithic, and the Muslim world is vast and varied. Within it are countless educators, health workers, artists, and activists committed to easing sexual anxiety and shame. They work steadily, step by step, to reintroduce conversations about pleasure, respect, and informed consent. Their hope is that future generations will feel less burdened by silence and fear. The West can lend a hand, but it must do so as a patient friend, not an imposing boss. With time, these efforts may help people in Muslim societies reclaim the sexual openness and intellectual curiosity that once flourished centuries ago. In the process, all participants can learn that healthy intimacy is a universal human quest, one that blossoms best when nurtured from within.
All about the Book
Dive into ‘Sex and the Citadel’ by Shereen El Feki, a groundbreaking exploration of sexuality in the Arab world, uncovering personal stories that challenge cultural norms and ignite conversations about intimacy, love, and identity in modern society.
Shereen El Feki, an acclaimed author and journalist, profoundly examines gender and sexuality in the Arab world, blending social science with personal narratives to advocate for change and understanding.
Sociologists, Psychologists, Sexual Health Educators, Cultural Anthropologists, Human Rights Activists
Reading about cultural studies, Attending discussions on gender issues, Volunteering for LGBTQ+ rights, Engaging in academic research, Traveling to explore different cultures
Sexuality and Identity, Cultural Taboos, Gender Inequality, Reproductive Rights
We are all sexual beings, with a right to love and express ourselves freely.
Malala Yousafzai, Michelle Obama, Stephen Fry
The British Book Awards, The Paragraphe Hemingway Prize, The Association of Publishers in Egypt Prize
1. How does culture shape our views on sexuality? #2. What role does religion play in sexual freedom? #3. How do gender roles affect sexual identity expression? #4. What challenges do LGBTQ+ individuals face in society? #5. How is sexual education approached in different cultures? #6. What historical events influenced modern sexual attitudes? #7. How can media impact perceptions of sexuality? #8. What are the implications of sexual health awareness? #9. How do social norms affect sexual relationships? #10. What is the significance of consent in sexual encounters? #11. How do laws shape sexual rights and freedoms? #12. What is the relationship between love and sexuality? #13. How can stigma around sexuality be addressed? #14. What are common misconceptions about sexual behavior? #15. How does economic status influence sexual experiences? #16. In what ways can community influence sexual choices? #17. What impact do scientific advances have on sexuality? #18. How can open conversations improve sexual understanding? #19. What does sexual empowerment look like for individuals? #20. How can cultures balance tradition and modern sexual values?
Sex and the Citadel, Shereen El Feki, sexuality in the Arab world, gender and sexuality, Middle Eastern culture, sexual liberation, Islam and sex, LGBTQ+ in the Middle East, cultural attitudes towards sex, women’s rights in the Arab world, sex education in conservative societies, human rights and sexuality
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