Introduction
Summary of the book Embrace the Suck by Brent Gleeson. Before moving forward, let’s briefly explore the core idea of the book. Imagine a life where obstacles do not knock you down, but challenge you to rise higher. Picture yourself accepting discomfort as an ally rather than fleeing from it. This book delves into a profound transformation: turning pain into a stepping-stone rather than a stumbling block. Inspired by the Navy SEAL ethos and highlighted by the insights of Brent Gleeson, you’ll find the tools to align daily actions with core values, harness stress as fuel, confront fear with courage, and build the discipline to push beyond your comfort zone. Instead of crumbling under hardship, you’ll discover ways to adapt, grow, and even thrive. As you read, you’ll see that every trial can shape your character and refine your sense of purpose. Prepare to learn, reflect, and take steps toward forging the resilient, extraordinary life you know you can live.
Chapter 1: Unraveling the Secret Strength Behind Embracing the Most Uncomfortable Life Challenges You Fear .
Imagine standing at the edge of an icy ocean, your body trembling as the freezing waves crash over your legs, and the biting wind numbs your face. Most people would run the other way, desperately seeking warmth and safety. Yet, in the world of Navy SEAL training, this type of discomfort is exactly what you must learn to embrace. To embrace the suck is to accept that hard, painful experiences are not simply hurdles to avoid. Instead, they are stepping-stones to discovering your inner strength and potential. While it may seem strange, those who willingly enter the cold surf or push through physical and mental anguish are not seeking punishment. They are forging resilience, the remarkable ability to face difficulty without giving up. This idea can apply to everyday life. Whether tackling a tough assignment at school or dealing with personal struggles, learning to welcome hardship can ultimately make you stronger.
In any challenging situation, your mind will likely scream at you to quit. This is natural—our brains are wired to seek comfort, to steer us away from painful situations and toward easier paths. But when you embrace discomfort, something remarkable happens. Instead of seeing obstacles as dreadful monsters, you start to recognize them as opportunities to grow. This mindset shift isn’t about ignoring fear or pretending that tough times don’t hurt. It’s about understanding that pain is a teacher and that struggle can refine your character. When Navy SEAL candidates endure brutal selection courses and intense training routines, they do so with an awareness that pain can be turned into fuel. By facing what they fear, they emerge more determined, focused, and fearless. And while most of us won’t face military-style challenges, we can still learn that leaning into discomfort can open doors to greater achievements.
Think about a time you tried something difficult and felt tempted to give up. Maybe it was learning a new skill like playing an instrument or improving your fitness by starting a demanding exercise routine. Perhaps it was presenting a project in front of a large audience, your stomach twisting with nerves. Those moments, though uncomfortable, present a choice: shy away or step forward. By choosing to persist, you tell yourself that you are braver than you once believed. You discover that even if you fail, you survive, learn, and can try again. Over time, these choices build a solid foundation of self-confidence. Just as a blacksmith repeatedly hammers metal to create a strong blade, you can repeatedly face discomfort and forge a more resilient mind. Embracing the suck does not mean enjoying pain; it means recognizing that pain’s presence can sharpen your abilities.
This idea of embracing hardship is not a magical secret reserved for elite warriors. It’s a principle that can guide anyone, at any age, through the maze of life’s struggles. Whether you’re handling school pressures, family conflicts, or social anxieties, learning to accept and confront discomfort can help you stand taller and think clearer. The transformation begins when you stop frantically running from what scares you and start leaning into it. This shift won’t be immediate or effortless. It may feel counterintuitive at first, but each time you remain steadfast in a tough moment, you add another layer of resilience to your character. Over time, you realize that the challenges you once dreaded now serve as proof of your growing inner strength. By embracing the suck, you’re not just surviving tough moments—you’re turning them into fuel that propels you toward an extraordinary life.
Chapter 2: Discovering Your Core Beliefs as the North Star Guiding Your Courageous Journey Forward .
Before you can truly embrace discomfort, it helps to understand why you’re doing it. One powerful way to stay focused during hard times is to define your core values—those deeply held beliefs that guide your decisions and shape who you want to become. Identifying these values is like discovering a personal compass hidden inside you. It might include qualities like honesty, loyalty, health, family, or kindness. When difficulties arise, remembering what you stand for can help you push through. For example, if you value health, the pain you feel during a challenging workout gains purpose. It’s no longer just sweat and fatigue; it’s a meaningful step toward living a healthier life. By writing down four to six core values, you create a blueprint for your actions. This blueprint can guide how you approach tough moments and ensure your struggles align with your true self.
Once you’ve chosen your core values, the next step is to translate them into daily behaviors—concrete actions that reflect those values in real life. If honesty is a core value, you might practice telling the truth even when it’s awkward or tricky. If you value discipline, you might wake up a bit earlier each morning to accomplish tasks without rushing. By connecting values with real-world habits, you transform abstract ideas into living principles. This approach works because it prevents your values from becoming empty words. Instead, they become active forces, shaping your responses to challenges. When difficulties strike—like a tough exam, a conflict with a friend, or intense pressure to achieve—you can rely on these established behaviors to keep you steady. Rather than feeling lost, you’ll know what to do. In turn, this keeps you from feeling overwhelmed and strengthens your resilience over time.
Building your value-based habits may not happen overnight. Just as you wouldn’t expect to lift enormous weights at the gym on your first visit, developing supportive behaviors requires patience and practice. Start small: pick one core value and brainstorm how to express it each day. Maybe you set a reminder in your phone or write a sticky note and place it on your bedroom mirror. Over time, these small, consistent actions stack up, turning good intentions into lasting routines. As you witness yourself acting in alignment with your values, you’ll feel more confident and rooted. When life gets challenging—when stress peaks, or fear whispers that you should quit—these habits will serve as stepping-stones, leading you back to what truly matters. Before you know it, you won’t just talk about integrity, perseverance, or kindness; you’ll live them, even when circumstances turn tough.
There’s another benefit to living by your values: accountability. By tracking your progress and holding yourself responsible for upholding these beliefs, you create a system that encourages growth. If, for instance, you fail to meet a fitness goal connected to your health value, you have a chance to reflect on why. Did you stay up too late scrolling on your phone, leaving you too tired to exercise? Did you forget to prepare healthy snacks? Reflecting honestly helps you adjust your actions moving forward. Over time, this process of evaluate-and-adjust builds mental toughness. You learn that setbacks aren’t reasons to give up, but opportunities to improve your methods. This is how values and actions combine to give you the grit you need. By knowing what you believe in and practicing it daily, you lay the foundation for facing life’s most daunting challenges.
Chapter 3: Transforming Painful Encounters into Fuel That Ignites Your Potential for True Growth .
When you think of pain, you might picture something you should avoid at all costs. Yet, there’s a hidden truth: when approached correctly, pain can be a powerful teacher. Navy SEALs know this well. During selection courses like Hell Week—an infamous period of grueling physical and mental tests—candidates face obstacles that push them far beyond their comfort zones. The intense discomfort, cold surf torture sessions, sleepless nights, and physical exhaustion are not random cruelty. They are designed to uncover who will crack and who will adapt. Those who persist through the torment learn how to harness pain as motivation. Beyond the military setting, you, too, can apply this principle in daily life. The struggles you face, whether they involve improving your grades, dealing with family issues, or stepping up as a leader among your peers, can become stepping-stones to realizing your highest potential.
Consider the story of a wounded Navy SEAL, Jason Redman, who refused to let pain define him. After being severely injured in combat, he could have given in to bitterness and despair. Instead, he declared his hospital room a pity-free zone, signaling that he wouldn’t allow self-pity to control him. He embraced the suck of his injuries and used that hardship as a platform to rebuild himself—both physically and mentally. This attitude shows that anyone can turn pain into strength by choosing to accept it and learn from it. Instead of viewing setbacks as reasons to give up, think of them as tough instructors showing you where you need to grow stronger. The scars that hardship leaves behind can become symbols of courage, reminding you that you are capable of facing uncomfortable realities and emerging wiser and more resilient.
This approach isn’t about enjoying pain—no one truly enjoys suffering. Rather, it’s about recognizing that unpleasant experiences can hold priceless lessons. Every time you lean into adversity, you train your mind to handle discomfort more effectively next time around. Facing difficulty repeatedly builds what Brent Gleeson calls brain calluses. Just as rough work can harden the skin of your hands, enduring hardship with a courageous mindset can toughen your mental framework. Over time, what once seemed impossible gradually becomes manageable, and then, perhaps, even routine. By shifting your perspective and reframing challenges, you teach yourself that pain doesn’t have to be a dead end. Instead, it can be a spark that lights your internal fire, urging you to push beyond old limits and find new sources of strength inside yourself.
The key to turning pain into motivation lies in understanding that you have a choice in how you respond. You may not control the difficult event itself—maybe you didn’t choose to struggle academically, face bullying, or deal with family troubles—but you do control your interpretation and reaction. Will you shrink from the pain, allowing it to convince you that you’re weak and powerless? Or will you acknowledge it, accept it, and decide to keep moving forward anyway? This decision, repeated over time, shapes your future. As you practice embracing the suck, you transform your mindset and forge inner tools for surviving future storms. When fresh challenges appear, you’ll no longer be the same uncertain person you once were. Instead, you’ll have a proven track record of using hardship as a catalyst, enabling you to push beyond what you once thought impossible.
Chapter 4: Breaking Down How Stress and Anxiety Can Become Your Secret Training Partners in Life .
Many people think of stress and anxiety as enemies—feelings to be eliminated, ignored, or feared. But what if you could see them differently? Stress and anxiety, in controlled amounts, can actually help you grow stronger and perform better. Think about a time you were nervous before a test, a tryout, or a performance. That buzzing energy in your stomach might have sharpened your focus, pushing you to prepare more thoroughly and pay closer attention. Researchers like Alia and Thomas Crum have shown that reframing stress can turn it into a powerful ally. Instead of letting stress freeze you with fear, imagine stress as a coach pushing you to improve. This doesn’t mean you want unlimited stress in your life. Rather, by acknowledging it and directing it toward constructive actions, you can harness stress to help you adapt and succeed under pressure.
The Crums’ model involves three steps: See it, Own it, Use it. First, you must recognize when stress appears. Notice how your heart speeds up, your thoughts race, and your breathing changes. Rather than panicking, acknowledge these signals as indicators that you’re facing something challenging but important. Next, Own it. This means accepting that stress is your body’s natural response to a demanding situation and that you have a say in what happens next. Finally, Use it. Instead of labeling stress as bad, you choose to channel that energy into preparation, problem-solving, or extra effort. For example, before a difficult presentation, you might feel anxious. By seeing, owning, and using that anxiety, you can practice more, refine your talking points, and visualize success. Rather than weakening you, stress becomes a tool that fuels growth, skill-building, and ultimately, confidence.
Of course, controlling emotions is not always easy. Sometimes, they can feel like wild horses galloping through your mind. Embracing stress doesn’t mean you never feel overwhelmed. It means understanding that overwhelming moments can be managed. This process involves becoming more comfortable with uncomfortable emotions. Instead of trying to stomp out fear or sadness, you learn to acknowledge these feelings, understand why they exist, and then guide them toward productive actions. Over time, this emotional understanding helps you prioritize what matters and respond thoughtfully rather than react impulsively. By continually practicing these techniques, you can turn intense feelings into reliable signals rather than seeing them as insurmountable threats. In the end, you train your emotional muscles just as you would train your body, building a resilient mindset capable of thriving even under immense pressure.
Imagine a future where the situations that used to scare you—like speaking in front of a crowd, tackling a complicated project, or facing a personal setback—no longer seem impossible. Instead, you view them as meaningful challenges, opportunities to learn and rise above old limitations. By mastering stress, you gain a superpower: the ability to maintain your composure and stay focused, even when life’s storms rage. This doesn’t happen overnight, but with practice, the shift is remarkable. Stress transforms from a dreaded foe into a silent supporter, encouraging you to keep going when the going gets tough. And as you repeatedly use stress in this way, you gain the confidence to take on bigger, bolder challenges. In this manner, each stressful encounter builds a stronger, smarter version of yourself, ready to push forward with courage and determination.
Chapter 5: Facing the Frightening Monsters of Failure and Fear to Shape a Grit-Filled Future .
At some point, everyone fails. Maybe you flunk a test, lose a big game, or realize a project you poured your heart into just isn’t working out. Failure is not a sign of weakness; it’s a normal part of growth. The problem is that failure can trick your mind into believing lies—that you’re not capable, that your dreams are too big, or that you’re forever stuck in disappointment. When this happens, you risk developing a failure complex that steals your motivation and confidence. The first step to overcoming this is recognizing that failure is not the final word. By viewing setbacks as lessons rather than personal condemnations, you can move forward. Each stumble can teach you something valuable. Maybe you need better time management, clearer communication, or more patience. Whatever the lesson, embracing it can transform an embarrassing mishap into a stepping-stone toward improvement.
Fear often walks hand-in-hand with failure, whispering that you’re better off not trying at all. Fear hates uncertainty and loves to keep you safely hidden in your comfort zone. Yet, if you want to achieve extraordinary things—whether in sports, academics, relationships, or personal growth—you must be willing to risk failing in front of others, messing up, and trying again. Navy SEALs learn this lesson during intense missions where everything can go wrong. They understand that perfection is an illusion. Instead of seeking an easy, flawless path, they train to adapt, pivot, and remain calm despite mistakes. This attitude allows them to move forward without letting fear paralyze them. By following their example, you can learn to confront fear directly, ask what it’s trying to protect you from, and then push forward anyway, gaining courage and confidence with every bold step.
Facing fear and failure doesn’t mean seeking them out just for the sake of suffering. It means accepting their role in shaping who you become. It’s about recognizing that messing up doesn’t define your worth. Instead, failures become clues that help you understand where you need more practice or a different approach. With every attempt—even a failed one—you become better at navigating difficulties. Over time, your brain learns that fear and failure are not endings but opportunities. This new perspective allows you to keep your focus on long-term goals. Rather than crumbling when things don’t go as planned, you adjust your strategy and keep moving. You become like a hiker who encounters fallen trees on the trail but finds ways around them instead of turning back. In this way, fear and failure lose their power to block your path.
When you adopt this fearless mindset, it doesn’t mean you’ll never feel frightened. Rather, it means you’ll trust yourself to handle whatever comes next. You learn to say, I may be afraid, but I won’t let fear decide what I can achieve. This attitude frees you from the chains of self-doubt, inviting you to dream bigger and attempt new ventures without terror at the thought of messing up. Whether you’re trying to improve your soccer skills, learn a difficult language, or create a meaningful project, approaching each challenge with bravery and resilience sets you apart. Overcoming failures and fears adds layers of grit to your character. Eventually, the things that once made your heart race with dread become reminders that you are stronger, smarter, and more determined than you ever thought possible.
Chapter 6: Building Daily Disciplines That Act Like Armor Against Constant Distractions and Temptations .
If embracing discomfort, facing failure, and harnessing stress are the building blocks of resilience, then discipline is the cement that holds them all together. Discipline is the art of doing what needs to be done, even when you don’t feel like doing it. Think about how easily you might be lured away from your studies by social media, games, or just daydreaming. Without discipline, important goals slip through your fingers. Navy SEALs understand this deeply. They train their minds to stay on task despite physical exhaustion and mental fatigue. They know that discipline isn’t just about sheer willpower; it’s also about setting up conditions that encourage good habits. For example, if you tend to procrastinate on schoolwork, creating a quiet study space and turning off distractions can help. By building supportive environments, you make it easier to stay disciplined and focus on what matters most.
Discipline also means forgiving yourself for slip-ups and then returning to your chosen path. No one can remain perfectly focused all the time. Sometimes, you’ll give in to a distraction, skip a planned workout, or forget to follow through on a new habit. The difference between those who succeed and those who don’t is how quickly they recover from these missteps. Instead of wallowing in guilt or giving up entirely, disciplined people reflect on why they stumbled and find strategies to prevent it next time. Maybe you realize you work better in the morning, so you schedule important tasks early. Or perhaps you discover that muting notifications helps you stay on track. Over time, each lesson you learn from your mistakes strengthens your willpower muscle, making it easier to resist temptations and stick to your goals.
To develop discipline, start by choosing one small action and doing it consistently. This could be making your bed every morning, spending fifteen minutes reading a challenging book, or taking a short daily walk. These tiny habits may seem insignificant, but over time, they prove to your brain that you can follow through on your intentions. As your confidence grows, you can add more habits and tackle bigger tasks. Eventually, discipline becomes second nature, like a protective shield against the obstacles life throws at you. It’s also helpful to measure your progress, noting which strategies work best for maintaining focus. By experimenting, adjusting, and persisting, you’ll find the methods that turn discipline into a powerful tool. This tool prepares you to handle demanding situations gracefully, ensuring that you stick to your values and achieve what you set out to do.
Imagine yourself in a year’s time, looking back at the daily efforts you made to strengthen your discipline. Perhaps you’ve learned to start your homework without delay, to train regularly for a sport, or to dedicate time each day to a personal project you love. The changes might seem subtle at first, but they add up to a huge difference in your mindset and abilities. With solid discipline, sudden challenges don’t throw you off track. You have a plan, you know your values, and you trust in your own reliability. You become the kind of person who, when faced with a tough goal, says, I can handle this, instead of making excuses. Ultimately, discipline helps transform all the lessons from previous chapters—embracing discomfort, facing fear, and using stress wisely—into lived experiences that steadily shape you into a more resilient and successful individual.
Chapter 7: Stepping Beyond Your Comfort Zone to Discover Hidden Pathways of Unexpected Achievement .
If you always stay where you feel comfortable, how will you know what you’re truly capable of? Comfort zones are safe places where you rarely fail, rarely feel scared, and rarely sweat under pressure. Yet, they’re also places where growth slows down. When you venture outside these cozy boundaries, you open yourself up to new experiences that strengthen your mind and body. Maybe it’s trying out for a competitive team, applying for a leadership role, or learning a skill that initially feels awkward. Each step outside your comfort zone represents a leap of faith—faith that even if you stumble, you’ll learn something valuable. Over time, these challenging leaps become launchpads for reaching heights you once thought unattainable. Suddenly, the tasks that once intimidated you now seem manageable, proving that your potential was always greater than you imagined.
Daily discomfort practices can help you ease into this new mindset. Perhaps you choose to do one difficult thing every day, whether it’s running a bit farther than you did before, striking up a conversation with someone new, or tackling a tricky math problem instead of avoiding it. These actions don’t need to be dramatic. Small steps over time can bring tremendous results. By repeatedly approaching challenges, you train your brain to see them not as threats but as invitations to improve. This simple strategy can help you handle bigger risks later on. When faced with a daunting test, a major competition, or an important presentation, your mind will recall your past experiences with discomfort. You’ll remember that you survived and learned from difficulties before, and this memory can give you the courage to press on despite fear.
As you continue to push yourself, you discover that life expands beyond what you once considered safe and ordinary. Your world grows richer with new skills, deeper relationships, and a stronger sense of identity. Challenges that once seemed huge now appear smaller because you’ve grown to match them. You learn to approach uncertainty with curiosity rather than dread. This mindset shift can influence every part of your life. It makes you a better teammate, a more creative thinker, and a more reliable friend. It allows you to see failure not as a final stop but as a meaningful checkpoint on a longer, more rewarding journey. Stepping beyond your comfort zone doesn’t guarantee easy success, but it guarantees growth—mental muscle-building that prepares you for a future filled with opportunities you might never have encountered otherwise.
With each venture into the unknown, you rewrite the stories you tell yourself about your limitations. No longer do you define yourself by what you cannot do. Instead, you focus on what you’ve achieved and how far you’ve come. Over time, you start to crave challenges because they keep you moving upward. You realize that life’s greatest rewards—improved skills, meaningful relationships, personal pride—often hide behind uncomfortable experiences. When you decide to embrace these tough moments willingly, you prove to yourself that you are capable of handling more than you ever believed possible. This powerful realization turns you into someone who doesn’t just survive difficulties, but thrives within them, constantly seeking new ways to grow and contribute to the world around you.
Chapter 8: Crafting a Life of Purpose by Aligning Your Long-Term Vision with Resilient Action Steps Every Day .
What do you truly want out of life? Answering this question might feel overwhelming, but it’s essential if you want to shape your future instead of drifting aimlessly. Perhaps you dream of becoming a skilled artist, a compassionate doctor, a successful entrepreneur, or a community leader who makes a difference. Crafting a purposeful life starts with painting a clear picture of what you value and want to achieve. It means looking beyond the here and now, imagining your future self, and deciding what kind of legacy you’d like to leave behind. Once you have a vision, you can start building a roadmap. Just as SEALs plan missions step-by-step, you can break down your big dreams into smaller goals. Each small accomplishment helps you gain traction, ensuring you don’t get lost along the way. Purpose keeps your eyes on the horizon, guiding your steps even during tough times.
Purpose also reminds you why you’re putting in the effort when discomfort strikes. When you know what you stand for and what you’re working toward, it’s easier to embrace the suck, endure frustrations, and keep pushing forward. If your ultimate goal is meaningful—say, improving your community or contributing to a cause you care about—then tough moments become investments in something bigger than yourself. It’s like climbing a mountain: each tiring step leads you closer to the breathtaking view at the summit. Without a purpose, you might abandon the climb as soon as your legs ache. With a purpose, though, you press on because you know the journey matters. Over time, your sense of purpose grows stronger, acting like a beacon of light guiding you through storms, showing you that the hardships you face are part of a larger story worth telling.
This larger story thrives on resilience—your ability to adapt, overcome setbacks, and keep striving. Resilience isn’t a talent you’re born with; it’s a skill you build by applying the lessons we’ve explored: embracing discomfort, controlling stress, facing fear, and practicing discipline. By combining these elements with a clear purpose, you become someone who refuses to settle for less than they’re capable of. Life’s challenges stop feeling like random hits and start feeling like tests you’re well prepared to meet. Resilient individuals don’t crumble under difficulties. They respond thoughtfully, adjust their methods, and come back stronger. Rather than resenting the journey, they appreciate that every twist and turn helps them refine their purpose and deepen their impact on the world. With purpose guiding you and resilience powering your efforts, your life can turn into a meaningful adventure that moves you far beyond your comfort zone.
The beauty of living with purpose is that it spreads hope and inspiration. When others see your dedication, your willingness to persist despite discomfort, and your commitment to your values, they become inspired as well. You never know who might be watching you handle adversity with grace. Your attitude could encourage someone else to try harder, keep going, or dream bigger. In this way, building resilience and living purposefully isn’t just about personal success—it’s about contributing to a world where more people dare to face their fears and grow stronger. Purposeful living ensures that your struggles aren’t wasted; they become meaningful ingredients in a legacy you’ll leave behind. And while not every day will feel triumphant, the steady heartbeat of your purpose and resilience will guide you, helping you live an extraordinary life defined by growth, courage, and the will to embrace the suck.
All about the Book
Discover the power of resilience in ‘Embrace the Suck’ by Brent Gleeson. This transformative guide empowers readers to overcome challenges, cultivate mental toughness, and thrive in adversity for personal and professional success.
Brent Gleeson is a Navy SEAL veteran and leadership expert, inspiring countless individuals and organizations through his impactful teachings on resilience, teamwork, and achieving excellence amidst adversity.
Business Leaders, Military Personnel, Life Coaches, Healthcare Professionals, Athletes
Self-Improvement, Adventure Sports, Team Building Activities, Public Speaking, Outdoor Survival Skills
Mental Toughness, Resilience in Adversity, Team Dynamics and Trust, Leadership Challenges
The only thing standing between you and your goals is the story you keep telling yourself.
Jocko Willink, Tony Robbins, Brene Brown
International Book Award, Reader’s Favorite Award, Gold Medal in the 2020 Axiom Business Book Awards
1. How can embracing discomfort lead to personal growth? #2. What strategies help cultivate resilience in tough situations? #3. How do shared experiences strengthen team bonds effectively? #4. What mindset shifts are crucial for overcoming challenges? #5. How can vulnerability improve leadership and influence? #6. What role does accountability play in achieving goals? #7. How can we develop a positive attitude in adversity? #8. What techniques can enhance adaptability in unpredictable environments? #9. How can gratitude transform our perception of hardship? #10. What does it mean to lead with authenticity? #11. How can we effectively support others in struggle? #12. What practices foster a culture of continuous improvement? #13. How does self-discipline contribute to overcoming obstacles? #14. What insights can failure provide for future success? #15. How can humor lighten the burden of challenges? #16. What steps can we take to build mental toughness? #17. How can empathy improve our connections with others? #18. What are practical ways to maintain motivation during hardship? #19. How does purpose influence our response to difficulties? #20. What is the impact of perspective on life’s challenges?
Embrace the Suck, Brent Gleeson, leadership, resilience, personal development, military mindset, overcoming adversity, motivation, self-improvement, business leadership, team performance, success strategies
https://www.amazon.com/Embrace-Suck-Brent-Gleeson/dp/0991031860
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